boy: Is mommy in Heaven?
dad: No, son. We just buried her, remember? She's being eaten by bugs 'n shit and rotting into slime.
boy: No, I mean is her spirit in Heaven?
dad: Oh. I see. No. She's just dead. There is no God.
boy: Really? Are you sure?
dad: Yes. I'm real fucking sure, son.
boy: But how do you know? How can you be so sure?
dad: If there was a God things like The Shitty Joke Dump and Barbra Streisand wouldn't exist.
boy: Yeah. That makes sense. You're right.
dad: Well, your mom's clothes 'n shit ain't gonna burn themselves. Let's go play with fire!