01 March 2010
THE GUY WHO INVENTED STAIRS
According to the "Kaalu" (pronounced Kay-Ah-Loo, whereas the Ah is the stressed syllable) calendar, stairs were invented in the year 4,34,23,21,3 , by a person called "Greegol 3132." According to legend, Greegol 3132 needed a way to get to fallen "Toora" (a cross between our cow and the ancient mammoth) on a ledge above him. When he had tried climbing and scratching at the wall before him, the inspiration took hold: If I push this stuff here and get on it, I can get there… This incendiary idea caught on in a big way after "Gorgom 2141" developed the process that would eventually be known by the name "Piles." When the two concepts came together, the face of civilization changed. We began an upward climb, making the unknown (by today's standards) inventors, Greegol 3132 and Gorgom 2141 extremely rich, by anyone's standards. Legend has it that the two inventors, eventually best friends, and the inventing team that brought us such further concepts and tools like: Holes To See Through (eventually windows), Raised Thing (eventually everything from pillows to foot stools to arm rest, etc), The Indent (eventually cup-holder, bowling ball, nut-n-bolt, etc), vanished without a trace. Their bodies were never found, and they were rumored to have invented or discovered an Immortality Source. This is largely discounted as hogwash, especially since the unearthing of an ancient ruin seeming to contain the remnants of two people and a handful of pile and removal technology preserved in miniature. As an aside, the two (possibly) unknown inventors now hold an official Modern Title: the inventors of the Miniature Model. Although many sources feel the two should be recognized as the inventor of stairs and other multi-level technologies, their place in history is cemented and guaranteed.